Growing Up With Violence

Growing up in a violent home is one of the most terrifying and traumatic experiences a child can go through.

It’s an experience that a child will not forget. It’s an experience that can affect every aspect of a child’s life, growth and their development.

Living in a violent home can cause children not to do well in school.

There is a definite correlation between domestic violence and child abuse. Growing up in a violent home can set patterns for children … patterns that can cause them to commit violence and abuse, and continue the cycle of violence and abuse.

Children living in violent homes are often too frightened and embarrassed to speak out.

Kids who grow up in violent environments are more apt to have health problems, use poor judgment, and have social and emotional issues.

They are also more apt to become high school dropouts, substance abusers, pregnant teens, gun users, and become juvenile and adult criminals.

Children who suffer from abuse can become adults with a host of additional problems such as poor self-esteem, staying in dead-end jobs or worse … not being able to keep a job.

There are high unemployment rates among adult abused children. They can be full of anger, can mistrust in relationships, are more apt to be bullies, commit road rage, and more horrific violent acts, and contribute to the high cost of our mental health and welfare programs.

We know that domestic violence causes serious harm to the millions of women who are abused, yet too little attention has been paid to the harm suffered by their children who witness domestic abuse.

Kids who grow up in violent homes can be helped through Intervention, prevention, and support programs. But there is much more to be done to keep them safe.

We must educate the public, advocate for more arrests, and stronger punishments for offenders.

America’s children who grow up in violent homes are forgotten. By creating awareness and educating the public, we can promote community and social responsibility – we can stop violence and help abused children.

It’s reported that 50 percent of the men who frequently assault their wives, also frequently abuse their children. School-age kids who grow up in violent homes generally exhibit a range of problem behaviors such as: depression, anxiety, and violence towards their peers.

When a parent terrorizes another parent, their children are terrorized too! Anger is deeply set within those children … anger that is so deep and long-lasting that when that child reaches adulthood, the damage is already done.

The terrorist parent leaves his children an incredible legacy of pain and problems -- societal and emotional problems that may never disappear.

An anonymous victim of domestic violence said:

She didn’t think she ever could have known, what an impact and witnessing domestic violence would have on her son’s life. Her son witnessed domestic violence continuously for the first six years of his life. His behavior became progressively worse, especially as he began to socialize with other kids. In kindergarten he became outraged if something did not go his way, and on many occasions, bit other children so hard that he drew blood. He would often slam and break things for no apparent reason, and had constant violent temper tantrums. It was at this time that this victim found the courage to leave the violent relationship she had with her son’s father. However as the years progressed, her son’s behavior escalated. He was physically aggressive towards other students, and constantly walked out of class when teachers confronted him with his disruptive behavior. The school alerted the mother to the fact that her son’s behavior wasn’t normal. Although her struggle as a victim is over, she must now stand by and watch her son struggle through the same journey. She feels she failed to protect him. There is nothing she can do to make it better, as her son experiences the effects of a family legacy that has claimed many victims. She has now sought psychological assistance for her son to deal with this long and painful legacy.

Violence and abuse have become our country’s legacy. When a parent hurts their child – physically or emotionally, we all feel the affects.

We know that violence is learned behavior. Children learn it from their parents and the cycle continues.

We also know that whatever is learned can be unlearned. It is up to all of us to be educated and learn all of the signs, symptoms and what we can do to stop children from hurting – to destroy the legacy!

CHILDREN WHO GROW UP IN HOMES
WHERE VIOLENCE IS PRESENT ARE:

- 6 times more likely to commit suicide

- 24 times more likely to be sexually assaulted

- 67 times more likely to engage in delinquent behavior as an adolescent

- 100 times more likely to be abusers themselves

- 1500 times more likely to be abused or neglected

United States Department of Justice: Special Report, 2002